As always, thank you for your service. This is going to end with you being the CEO and/or owner of Intellivision somehow.
It's cliche to say everything in American life is now sports fandom, but at first I wanted to draw even more parallels to the cults of the Pittsburgh Steelers and the Amico. I've lived in four cities with NFL teams in my life, and the 'Burgh had by far the most deluded fandom. However, Steelers fans still watch all the games and have at least some intimate knowledge of their current-day product, even if they want a mediocre running back to get 40 touches a game while scream-singing Styx's "Renegade". I'm not sure what the Amico fandom equivalent is; maybe buying a knockoff Steelers shirt in The Strip District and making hours-long videos about why "Pittsburgh Football Team 6 Rings" is destined to win the Super Bowl without, like, naming its quarterback. I don't know, the analogy falls apart very quickly, maybe for the reason you specified: these people make no goddamn sense.
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